She should've run off with Rumpelstiltskin

I was shelving some childrens books the other day and I came across an old favorite: "Rumpelstiltskin".It was close to closing time, I was alone and had nothing to do, so I sat down and actually read the story. I cried (I'm such a nerd). It's a horrible fairytale. Poor innocent bystander gets dragged into an awful relationship thanks to her stupid, good for nothing, liar of a father biological paternal sperm donor (jerk). She gets threatened and married in the same breath by a greedy loser king, then blackmailed by a magical midget!What does our unfortunate heroine get for her trouble? A baby. Don't get me wrong, babies are great, but don't you think she should get something else too? I don't know, TRUE LOVE maybe?I say off with king whats-his-face's head and bring on a real happy ending!